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The Perfect Classic Eggnog

Eggnog is one of those things that was introduced to me as a young child, which made me look forward to the holiday season every winter. And that was because we got the store-bought varieties. They varied in quality, and of course I became a tiny bit snobbish in my preference of brands - not that I can even remember what they were now! But it wasn't until decades later that I discovered what eggnog really is, of what the commercial versions were aspiring to invoke the proper nostalgia.

Well, I've been making eggnog for the past two years, and while I have come to accept and embrace many permutations based on taste or availability of supplies, this has evolved as my go-to no-brainer “basic” starting point. I’ve also come to integrate eggnog into my standard kitchen repertoire - not just for icy holidays but as a pleasantly versatile year-round treat with the capacity for infinite multi-seasonal variations. 

Please note that this is a COOKED concoction! So both the eggs and the alcohol from the cognac and the vanilla will get cooked into the mixture before serving. You may reduce the amount of liquor you put in at the beginning if you’d like to add more uncooked hooch at the end. 

INGREDIENTS:

• 2 quarts heavy cream

• 18-24 egg yolks (depending on size)

• Honey

• Maple syrup (dark if possible)

• Pure vanilla extract, preferably vanilla bean)

• Freshly ground nutmeg (a lot!!)

• Ground cinnamon (or 4 sticks)

• Cognac or Brandy (Ansac or Armagnac or whatever you like)

• Optional: Whole milk or half&half to thin if necessary

DIRECTIONS:

1. Combine ½ the cream and the rest of the ingredients except the eggs in a saucepan that’s about twice the size of your quantity so you have room to whisk. 

2. Heat until simmering on MEDIUM HEAT (like a 4), stirring occasionally.

3. Whisk your egg yolks in a separate heavy bowl until smooth, not long.

4. When the cream mixture is bubbling, ladle it slowly in a small stream into the eggs WHILE WHISKING constantly until smooth. You want to gradually raise the temperature of the eggs without cooking them to scrambled eggs. Do one ladleful at a time until about half of your mixture has been transferred and the eggs are hot but still smooth.

5. Do the reverse: ladle the egg mixture  in a small stream into the saucepan gradually WHILE WHISKING constantly until incorporated.. DO NOT STOP WHISKING (for more than 2 seconds if absolutely necessary). It can be helpful to have a second person pouring and then using a spatula to get all the last drops into the pan while you whisk.

6. CONTINUE TO WHISK CONSTANTLY until you feel the eggs start to thicken the mixture considerably.

7. REMOVE FROM HEAT IMMEDIATELY and whisk in the remaining cream to cool the mixture and prevent curdling.

8. Taste and adjust flavorings and sweetness as desired.

9. Chill completely before serving to continue thickening and for the flavor to develop. (You can serve it warm if you like it, but it won’t taste quite the same as “classic eggnog” flavor. I like both!)

10. Taste again before serving and adjust flavorings or add half&half to thin if it’s too thick. 

11. Serve with optional hooch or extra cinnamon/nutmeg on the side.

ARIELLE'S NOTES:

Basically I make it like melted ice cream, thick and rich and holds up to modification with other liquids - this is easily scalable, just think 8-12 egg yolks per quart of cream depending on size of eggs. If you have less cream on hand and need to supplement with milk or half&half, use more egg yolks to thicken it more.. I used to do 1 quart of cream to 3 quarts whole milk and 28 egg yolks, so the range of possibilities is very flexible. You may also substitute coconut milk and coconut cream or nut mylks, but keep in mind that they are much thinner than heavy cream, so you’ll likely need to use more eggs and possibly some gelatin or agar agar for thickener.

I typically use Ansac cognac or brandy, and this is totally optional but it won’t have that je ne sais quoi flavor without it in the cooking phase. I may also use Chartreuse, Canton, or Cointreau, passionfruit or mango liqueur, or my own lavender or ginger tincture for flavoring if desired. I'd advise adding these at the end if possible so as not to obscure any of the delicate flavors. Add the base alcohol to the cream at the beginning so it cooks into the mixture. Then if you want it actually alcoholic, add more after it’s chilled. You can serve the hooch on the side so people can choose if/how much to add.

For a rich dark chocolate version, either melt a cup of desired chocolate into some milk/cream and incorporate slowly, or whisk in cacao or cocoa powder (start with ¼ cup and then add more a TBSP at a time until you've reached the desired darkness). Then adjust sweetness as needed. Do this BEFORE incorporating the egg yolks. You can omit the brandy if you want a more pure hot chocolate flavor, but it pairs well with cointreau, chartreuse, and berry liqueurs. In any case, you’ll hardly ever want standard hot chocolate ever again!